45 Ways to Rekindle the Spark: A Hot Summer Guide
Hello everyone! Simone here, from Happytoys.
Let’s be honest: in a long-term relationship – especially with kids running around who prefer to yell "mommmyyy" at you all day long – sex can sometimes feel like a chore. By the evening, you’re just happy to reach the bed without anyone needing anything else from you. It’s completely logical that the spark might dim a little, somewhere between the morning rush and the evening Netflix binge.
But good news: the pilot light is still on! This summer is the perfect invitation to rediscover each other. Forget trashy porn; it’s about laughing, feeling, and playing. Time to reignite the spark with a fresh perspective.
Quick wins
Get out and get active
Sometimes a change of scenery helps. Book a hotel room for that necessary "me-time" without distractions, or create a private spa at home with warm oil and relaxing scents. Head outdoors for sex in the garden, on the terrace, or simply shower together to keep the barrier low.
Playing with senses
Blindfolds make everything more intense because you have to focus on your other senses. Use massage oils or warm stones to get to know each other again. Try some "stealth" vibrations with a remote-controlled vibrator during an everyday activity; it’s guaranteed to lead to fits of laughter and excitement.
New dynamics and connection
Try the alphabet technique (writing the alphabet with your tongue on sensitive spots – a real classic!) or experiment with vibrating rings for that extra stimulation you both enjoy. And don't forget the most important thing: communication. Share a fantasy you never dared to tell before, or have a little debrief where you mention what you admire about your partner right now.
Simone’s favorites
"My personal tip? Make an intimate playlist and start with a slow dance," says Simone. "It might be a little awkward at first, but pushing through that awkwardness is exactly what creates the connection you need for the rest of the evening."
45 Ideas, 0 excuses
Here is an overview of the ideas from the list to get you started:
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- Heatmapping: take your time to rediscover each other's bodies. Use your hands to find the most sensitive zones. Sometimes you think it's the nipple, and damn, it’s an elbow. Who knew?!
- The slow dance: stand face-to-face and move slowly, sensually, without rush. Just feel and push past the awkwardness. Fun!
- Warm stones & ice cubes: massage with heated stones, alternated with ice cubes. Zen and sizzling.
- Breathing to the other's rhythm: breathe synchronously, feel the connection grow even before anything happens.
- Stealth vibrations: wear a remote-controlled toy during an everyday activity. Exciting or... maybe not, but then it’s a good laugh.
- Roleplay via messages: send each other sultry texts as strangers looking to flirt.
- Blindfold: take away one sense and the rest becomes twice as intense.
- Command cards: write tasks on cards, take turns drawing them, and carry them out.
- Sexy texts: send a suggestive message instead of a grocery list. Or a dick pic or two.
- Seduction massage: start with a regular massage, let your hands wander.
- Striptease: Pick a song and move in a way that makes you feel sexy.
- Sensual dance: put on an intimate playlist, dance against each other, slow and without rush. "I feel sexy when I dance."
- Pleasure map drawing: explore each other’s body with textures and discover new hotspots.
- Alphabet technique: write the alphabet with your tongue on sensitive spots. Original and effective. Wasn't that something from Fancy (remember Millennials?) as well?
- The better handiwork: hand, mouth, hand, mouth. Variety = surprise = fun.
- Tantric basics: caressing without a goal. Attention without haste. Slowing down is key.
- Power play: alternate who takes control. With agreements and a safe word.
- Edging: let your partner almost reach the peak and then... pause.
- Soft dominance: whispering voice, clear instructions. Less is more.
- Turning off senses with music: headphones on, let the other person feel. Complete surrender.
- Book a hotel room: away from home = away from distractions. Just the two of you.
- Sex in the garden: with candles, a blanket, or on the trampoline.
- At the office: naughty, but make sure you really can't get caught, right!?
- Private spa: jacuzzi, sauna, and each other. That’s all you need.
- Shared vibrator: a toy that spoils both of you. Win-win.
- Stare and keep staring: 3 minutes of eye contact before you start. More intense than you'd think.
- Erotic soundscape: listen to sultry music together.
- Trip down memory lane: picture your first time together.
- Yoni massage: focus on genital zones without performance pressure. Loving and tender.
- Edible body paint: edible paint on each other's body. And then... get licking.
- Closing cuddle: long cuddling, breathing together. The ultimate afterglow.
- A little debrief: say what you admire or desire in each other.
- Shower together: it’s sometimes so easy and not worth overthinking.
- Mirror, mirror on the wall: look into the mirror together while making love.
- Basic tantra: be intimately slow, attentive, and connected. No rush, just feeling.
- Pleasure rings: vibrating rings that provide extra stimulation during sex.
- Stone massage: warm stones on back or stomach. Relaxing and sexy.
- A little fantasy: share a fantasy you never dared to tell.
- Sensual aromatherapy: scents that arouse or calm. Try lavender or ylang-ylang. Or the scent of fresh sheets.
- Butterfly position: lying side-by-side in a corner. Intimate and with free hands.
- Throne position: sit in the chair, the other on top. Power and eye contact combined.
- Take a bath together: bubbles, oil, drink on the side. Washing and spoiling each other.
- Erotic photoshoot: take photos for the two of you.
- Sex under the stars: use your garden or terrace. Fresh air + body = magic.
- Deep embrace: just sit or lie in each other's arms and see where it goes! .
Whether you choose a shared vibrator for mutual pleasure or simply stare into each other’s eyes for 3 minutes before you start: it’s all about attention, time, and slowing down.
At Happytoys we believe everyone has a right to a sparkling sex life. Feel free to stop by the webshop for inspiration and don't forget: we ship everything in completely neutral packaging. So you can enjoy your summer adventures in total discretion.
Have fun exploring!
#happytoys #sexuality #relationshipadvice #summerlove #intimate #selfcare #discreet #pleasure #relationshipcoach
Delen
