Sex is a celebration of pleasure, connection, and discovering what really makes your partner melt. Yet, many beginners (and even the experienced) forget that a woman needs some warming up to reach the real fireworks. And that’s where cunnilingus comes in—one of the most intimate, enjoyable, and underrated acts of love. Cunni... what? The oral satisfaction of a woman. And in the vernacular—pun intended— eating out, going down, licking, muff diving, carpet munching... and so much more.
But how do you actually do it well? Here are the tips that your (first) love probably never got. In their defense: back then we only had magazines like the Fancy, and the advice there was mostly very confusing. And now you might be dealing with a teenager who knows how it works, but whether there’s any pleasure involved in that, well, that’s another question. Oh dear, my teenager isn't going to get their sex advice from Pornhub, are they? No, let’s just sort that out right here.
The advice your first love should have received. Sorry, first love, the intention was definitely there, but the execution… well. What’s more… it reminds me of a car trip with kids. It was too long, sweaty, and a frustrating game of “are we there yet?”
1. Communication is sexy
Before you start the adventure, talk to each other. Use your mouth to communicate first. It is important to discuss with your partner what she enjoys and where your boundaries lie. You only know if you ask. Ask what she feels comfortable with and if there are things she prefers to avoid. This can be done with a simple, sensual question like: "I would love to spoil you. What do you like?" This way, you not only discover what works but also show that her pleasure is truly important. Moreover, the conversation itself can be a turn-on.
2. The magic of teasing
Don't head straight for the goal; build the tension slowly. Kiss her thighs, stroke her hips, and stay in the spirit of the car trip analogy: find the right route first. We all know all roads lead to Rome—or in this case, the vulva. This prepares her whole body for what's to come. A little teasing can work wonders.
3. Technique over enthusiasm
Cunnilingus is not a competition. It’s about technique and discovering what works. Here are a few basic techniques to start with:
- The flat tongue: Make long, soft movements with the flat side of your tongue. Slow and steady is key.
- The pointed tongue: Use the tip of your tongue to make small circles around the clitoris.
- Gentle suction: Place your lips around the clitoris and suck very lightly. Start gently and build up.
Listen to her body language: if she moans or pulls your head closer, you're on the right track.
4. Use your hands (and more)
Cunnilingus doesn't just have to be oral work. Involve your hands: massage her thighs, stroke her breasts, or use your fingers to gently stimulate her vagina. Multitasking makes the experience all the more intense.
5. Don't forget to breathe and take your time
On average, it takes a woman longer to reach an orgasm, which means you need some stamina. Pay attention to your breathing: turn your head slightly to the side to catch your breath without stopping. Think of it as a marathon, not a sprint.
6. Feedback is your best friend
Check in occasionally to see if she's enjoying it. It doesn't have to be constant, but saying something like "Do you like this?" or "Do you want me to go faster?" shows you're paying attention to what works. And if you notice something that really works, stick with it.
7. Safety above all
Yes, you can contract STIs through oral sex, really. So be careful...
Cunnilingus isn't about perfection, but about attention and pleasure. Sometimes a little clumsiness can even be extra fun. Anyway, I digress. Feel free to leave this article open on your laptop when your teenager walks in; that way, at least they won't be getting their information from Pornhub. Show them that it's about getting to know your partner and making them happy, and that that's always a good idea. Because believe us: a good lover is always remembered.
The bad ones too… sorry again, first love.
