Bondage, Gag & Blindfold in the bedroom

Bondage is the reduction of the freedom of movement of the partner by means of rope, cuffs or restrictive clothing. Discipline is the giving of orders, possibly with real or pretended punishment. Dominance and submission is the exercising of, or subjection to power, often in the form of role play. Finally, sadomasochism is the enjoyment of causing (sadism) or suffering (masochism) pain.

In a study in Flanders by the Psychiatric Research Center of the University of Antwerp and the University Forensic Center (UZA), attributes were ranked by practitioners according to frequency of use as follows:

1. ice cubes
2. use of blindfold
3. use of handcuffs/rope
4. to beat with a whip
5. use of clothes pegs, nipple clamps, candle wax

A safety code or stop word can be agreed upon for the submissive and dominant, at which the action in the game is immediately stopped and the submissive is freed from a precarious position. No reason needs to be given for giving the stop word, the agreement is that it will be stopped at this signal. One can get out of the game, no longer enjoy it, something can go wrong that the other does not see. The traffic light system is a common series of stop words.

• Red - means: stop immediately and check in with your partner
• Yellow - means: take it easy, be careful
• Green - means: it's going well, we can start or we can continue like this. This can be said by everyone before the game can start, or during the game, by all participants.

Boundaries are also agreed upon in advance within which the game will move. If a previously agreed hard boundary is crossed by one of the players, it is recommended not to play with this partner anymore, unless one is a regular (sex play) partner. Sometimes a checklist is used for this.

Partial suspension bondage at a trade fair with specially made rope

BDSM can be practiced in the bedroom context, but also as a way of life in which it takes a place in daily life. There are different gradations in this. The 24/7 relationship is a relationship in which the dom dominates the sub 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, but without this affecting work, study and family ties too much. People often still have the possibility to talk to each other as equals and the sub usually has some say in what does or does not happen. A more extreme variant is TPE (Total Power Exchange), in which the total power is in the hands of the dominant and he or she can therefore decide on every aspect of the submissive's life as a game. The sub can want to stop at any time and that must be respected.